A lot of us have heard of a swear jar. If you haven’t, just imagine a jar with a slit in its cap big enough to insert money into (sort of like a piggy bank). Parents have been using swear jars for decades. The idea behind the swear jar is simple: Every time someone in the house uses a swear word, they have to insert a predetermined amount of money (like a quarter or a dollar) into the jar. And once the jar gets full, the money inside is usually donated or put towards a good cause.
I love the idea of a swear jar because it creates a win-win situation. You end up swearing less often (who likes losing money?) and if/when you do use a swear word, the money you lose goes towards a good cause. You end up improving yourself and at the same time you can help improve the lives of others. That is self improvement at its finest.
But why stop at using the jar for just swearing?
Being the self improvement nut that I am, I take the idea of the swear jar a few steps further. I don’t physically have a jar that I deposit money into, but I write down each and every thing I catch myself doing that I want to change. It could be anything, like losing my patience, overeating, succumbing to fear, thinking negatively for more then a minute, failing to be positive, etc. Whatever it is, I will write down what I did and what I will do instead the next time the circumstances are similar. I call each thing I write down a “point” (because I write them down in bullet point form).
So, what’s the Self Improvement System?
1. Record every action (or inaction) that you wish to change or improve upon in a journal or notebook. Make sure to include the date and what you will do the next time the circumstances are similar. Here is an example of one of my points:
May 28th – I lost my patience with my girlfriend because she couldn’t find the restaurant she was looking for and wasn’t giving up. I was hungry and just wanted to eat anywhere. Next time, I will stay patient and just communicate how I feel instead of holding it in and then all of the sudden saying something I wish I hadn’t. I won’t let the fact that I am hungry get to my attitude.
2. At the end of the month, review all of your “points” and pay special attention to things that you see more than a couple of times. These are your habits, and are your greatest area of opportunity for you to improve in. Read what you will do next time out loud in each point. These should become your new positive affirmations.
3. At the end of the month, count up all of your “points” and multiply the amount you determined you will donate per point. For example:
May’s total of points: 57
Amount per point: $1
Total amount to donate: 57 x $1 = $57
4. Keep all of your point logs (from every month) so you can review them later and track how you improve over time.
Now, the point of donating a certain amount of money per point is to make you NOT want to do it. So if you set the amount to donate too low (like a dime or a quarter) you won’t have the motivation to avoid doing the things you shouldn’t. Likewise, if your “good cause” is something that will benefit you (like money towards a new car), you’ll actually have an incentive to accumulate points! Not something I’d recommend =).
For those of you who don’t want to use money as your motivation, you can use something else like doing 5 push ups for every point or a lap around the track. But regardless of what you use to “pay” for your points, don’t make it so hard on yourself to the point where you WON’T follow through with it. And at the same time, don’t make it too easy where it won’t really motivate you to improve either.
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Just amazing. I am loving it. Really so helpful. Thank you.
It is another nice article. Great going dear.